Trump Descends Into Paranoid Spiral on Christmas Day

What’s Grandpa Trump’s version of telling stories by the fire on Christmas? It seems to be unleashing a flurry of more than 100 posts on Truth Social lying, complaining, and congratulating himself.

In the early hours of Thursday, Trump published a torrent of posts targeting former presidents Joe Biden and Barack Obama, Representatives Marjorie Taylor Greene and Ilhan Omar, Senator Mark Kelly, Somalis in Minnesota, Michigan’s secretary of state, Democrats in California, and “RINOs,” just to name a few.

Following the flood, Trump penned a special message to “the many Sleazebags who loved Jeffrey Epstein,” and congratulated himself for “dropping” the convicted sex offender “long before it was fashionable to do so.”

“Enjoy what may be your last merry Christmas!” Trump added.

While speaking to a child later Thursday who’d made the mistake of calling NORAD’s Santa Tracker, Trump descended into a paranoid spiral.

“Well we track Santa. We want to make sure that Santa is being good. Santa’s a very good person. We want to make sure that he’s not infiltrated, that we’re not infiltrating into our country a bad Santa,” Trump said, inventing a new problem for American children to mull.

“So, we found out that Santa is good. Santa loves you. Santa loves Oklahoma like I do. You know, Oklahoma was very good to me in the election. So, I love Oklahoma. Don’t ever leave Oklahoma, okay?

On Christmas Eve, Trump also bid a Merry Christmas to all, “including the Radical Left Scum,” and took a moment to pat himself on the back for things he has not accomplished, like “No Inflation” and “Trillions of Dollars” from his reciprocal tariffs.