Woman's response to mom asking to access her savings account applauded

A young woman has been backed online for refusing to let her mom have access to her savings account.

In a post on Reddit's popular AITAH "Am I the A**hole?" forum, user ComprehensiveWin82 explained how her mom, aged 48, has been pressuring her to grant access to her hard-earned savings in case of "family emergencies."

The woman, who said she has been working since she was 18, explained that she has consistently contributed to her family's expenses—including groceries and school supplies for her younger brother. Despite this, her mom is still asking for direct access to her account, claiming it would be for unforeseen emergencies.

"But my mom insists it's not enough. She wants direct access to my savings account 'just in case something big happens,'" ComprehensiveWin82 said on Reddit. She got really upset, saying I don't trust her and that I'm being selfish. My dad has stayed out of it, but my older sister thinks I'm overreacting."

She turned to the internet to ask if she was wrong to refuse her mom access to the account.

The post sparked many opinions, with over 12,000 upvotes and 6,000 comments. People overwhelmingly backed the woman.

User 792bookcellar advised: "I would highly recommend you do NOT share your account information, not even your balance... You should also get a credit check to make sure you don't have any other open accounts you are not aware of."

While another commenter, busyshrew, said: "Lock up your credit and identity information to prevent ID theft from your mom. She's signaling pretty strong intent to get your money somehow."

Marcus Sturdivant Sr., an adviser at Tristate Financial Advisors, told Newsweek: "I know some cultures are matriarchal and the mom's control of a family's finances is not unheard of, mainly outside the U.S. The mom and the rest of the family may think this is status quo. Even in the U.S., it was customary for men to come home and give their wives paychecks to pay the bills and handle the budget."

But Sturdivant said he would be reluctant to advise giving her family access to finances. "I would not want my parent with direct access to my savings account for emergencies, we may define an emergency as a different event," he said. "The daughter should not feel guilty."

"Don't do it, they will drain that account. It is not normal to request access to someone's bank account," said another Reddit comment from user Short_Bus8309.

One user, A-typ-self, commented: "You said that you would be willing to help with a big financial emergency. That's helping family on your terms. The only reason to give your mother access at this point would be for her to access that money without your knowledge."

Newsweek reached out to ComprehensiveWin82 via Reddit for comment. We were not able to verify the details of this case.